How LSU Changed Me Forever

August, 2011. I moved into West Laville Honors Hall, ready to start anew. High school left me tired, angry and bored. I anticipated the memories I would make, the friends I would meet and the classes I would take. None of it had happened yet, which made it most exciting. I began the fresh start immediately.

I rushed. I met wonderful women in all ten Panhellenic sororities, and I found my home in ZTA. I pledged to be loyal, considerate and loving to my new sisters. I learned the secrets. I made the house my home. Those girls became my sisters after sharing closets, memories and stories. We walked the lakes together, we celebrated together, we studied together. I held a sister's hand when she ended a destructive relationship. I cried when she was hurt. We told jokes and pulled pranks. I lounged in the front yard, adored our housekeeper and laughed loudly at all hours of the night.

I enrolled in classes. I received a 'D' on my very first college paper, a wake-up call for the egocentric high school valedictorian. I met with my professor. I took notes. I listened to feedback. I learned there is always room for improvement. I finished MC 2011 with an 'A.'

I went to every home football game. I tailgated. I learned to like beer. I stood on bleachers in the burning sun, chanting, "Geaux!" until my voice was hoarse. I sweated in sundresses and sandals, and swore nothing, absolutely nothing, could cheer a soul like those hallowed four notes in pregame. I watched Tigers like Reid, Claiborne, Mingo, Mathieu, Randle, Ware, Landry, Hill and Beckham, Jr. become legends. I watched in disbelief when the Tide felled the Tigers. I got upset. I got real upset. Then, I remembered there's more to a college than its football team, and in my case there was a lot more to LSU than its football team. I stormed the field. I sang. I cheered. I cried while singing the Alma Mater for the last time, arms wrapped around my sisters, because there's no place like Louisiana State University.

I took my parents' advice and "got involved." I wrote for The Daily Reveille. My sisters elected me to ZTA's executive council. Twice. I studied abroad for a summer in Ireland.  I represented the Manship School in a purple polo and recruited future students. I landed a few internships. I listened to lectures and concerts, watched movies and plays and volunteered for the community.

I met a boy in class. He walked me from Coates to the Union. He took me to the Northgate for our first date. We picnicked on the Parade Grounds. We danced at Groovin'. We learned everything about each other in Alex Box, on the Indian Mounds and in Middleton. He pinned his fraternity badge on me. I fell in love.

I met people from faraway, mysterious places like England, Bangladesh, New York, California, Missouri... and the North Shore. I laughed until tears leaked down my cheeks, clutching my ribs. I learned much about my major, and the more I knew, the more I understood I actually know very little. I questioned my faith. I ran back to God, quickly. I re-evaluated my political beliefs. I stood firm on the big things, but I did reconsider the smaller issues. I became wiser. I became confident. I became a better listener. I became a better speaker. I became a better thinker.

Louisiana State University made me the woman I always wanted to be. I've done everything at LSU I dreamed I would when I first moved in, except one thing.

And tomorrow, I graduate.

Thinking about whatever is just,
Danielle

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16 Things Being In a Sorority Taught Me

The perks of graduating a semester early are fantastic, but there's one big con. I get a head start on graduate school, but I also have to move out of my sorority house a semester early. One of the biggest reasons I decided to rush is that I always wanted siblings. An only child, I thought having sorority sisters would be the closest thing to the real thing. Today I can say with confidence that those women are my sisters, and I'd do anything in the world for them. Beside gaining sisters, I also gained some practical knowledge from joining Zeta Tau Alpha.

1. Being in a sorority taught me how to share.
I didn't have many opportunities to learn how to share as I child since I didn't have siblings. I learned real quickly how to share everything with my sisters once I moved in the house. Sharing house chores, sharing closets, sharing a room, sharing a mirror, sharing snacks...

2. Being in a sorority taught me how to lead.
I don't know how other sororities function, but there's an opportunity for everyone in mine to lead. I joined programming council the second semester of my freshman year as service chair. My sisters trusted me to organize service projects like Operation: Christmas Child and helping out at the Special Olympics. I even got to throw a 90th birthday party for the woman responsible for my chapter's national charter. After gaining experience as service chair, I decided to run for executive council. My sisters elected me two years in a row on the council as the chapter's public relations chair and ritual chair. I learned so many skills in those leadership positions, like how to be a peacemaker, how to represent my sisters in public and how to communicate my ideas clearly. I know that these skills will come in handy in the workplace.

3. Being in a sorority taught me how to follow.

While it's important to learn how to lead, it's also important to learn how to follow. I learned to respect authority, obey orders and ask how I can help those above me how I can help. This goes full circle, because people are more likely to follow me when it's my time to lead if I follow others when it's their time to lead.

4. Being in a sorority taught me how to fight... fairly.
The thing about have more than 300 sisters is never in a million years will every single person agree on anything. Be it the location of semi-formal, how much money we spend on house renovations or whether to have tacos or pasta for dinner, someone will disagree with you. I learned to pick my fights. What was worth fighting for? When was it ok to let it go? I learned to approach those that disagreed with me with kindness, open ears and strength.

5. Being in a sorority taught me how to speak in public.
Every week for my two years on executive council I had to stand up in front of hundreds of women and give a report for my office. At first, I rambled. I stumbled my way through my notes and my neck broke out with splotchy red spots. I wasn't necessarily afraid of speaking in public - especially in front of the women I called my sisters - but it wasn't something I was comfortable with. Over the months, I learned tips and tricks to speak concisely and confidently. Public speaking is now a breeze!

6. Being in a sorority taught me the art of conversation.
Perhaps the most nerve-wracking part of being in a sorority is the hell that is recruitment. Bouncing, clapping, singing and dressing in matching dresses has absolutely no benefit to learning about potential members. Unfortunately, we're stuck doing it until the entire row can agree that it's probably best to spend more time speaking to incoming freshman instead of trying to impress them with how pretty we can look while chanting at them in high heels. Rant aside, I learned the art of conversation while rushing potential members. I learned to never ask questions like, "Soooo, what's your major?" and "How's the weather out there?" (answers: "I don't know what I'm doing with my life yet, so stop freaking me out" and "Humid and 105 degrees, please ignore my sweat stains, dripping make-up, and overall stench"). I instead learned how to take the awkward situation of rush and instead make a girl feel at home by simply getting to know her. I can get the small talk out of the way, read body language and ask poignant questions that stimulate real conversation.

7. Being in a sorority taught me how to delegate.
While serving on executive council, some of my sisters signed up to be my assistants. I learned to give my assistants assignments. It saved me stress during busy weeks, and it taught my assistants skills they needed to know.

8. Being in a sorority taught me how to keep a secret.
The absolute coolest thing about being in a sorority is the secret rituals. Rituals are a time when we learn about the qualities that make a good woman, and how to live moral lives. Rituals bind me with my sisters who live across the nation, who are much older than me and who are younger than me. I swore to keep what happens in ritual a secret, and I'll keep that secret to my grave.

9. Being in a sorority taught me to be a feminist.
Despite the stereotype, sorority women are strong, smart and forward-thinking people. Sororities were founded by women in a time when they couldn't even cast ballots. Sororities are little havens of society where women can lead and encourage other women to excel at whatever they want to accomplish in life. I've learned to demand equal pay for equal work and to fight against domestic abuse, sexual assault and rape.

10. Being in a sorority taught me how to give.
Philanthropy is a huge aspect of my sorority, and I've learned to put others before myself. I am cheerful to give my money, energy and time to causes I believe in. I've also learned to help out people I love, including my sorority sisters. When they're caught in a tight spot, I will do anything I can to help.

11. Being in a sorority taught me to say 'no.'
In high school, I was the annoying girl involved in absolutely EVERY club or activity. When I pledged my sorority, I learned to pick and choose what I want to dedicate my time to. I learned that it's best to excel in one or two organizations rather than stretching myself too thin among dozens of organizations. I learned to say "no" when asked to take positions I didn't really want or to do tasks I really didn't enjoy. I am a less anxious and less stressed person, and I'm thankful for it.

12. Being in a sorority taught me to stand up for myself.
My sisters have instilled confidence and composure in me. I've learned to stand up when people try to walk over me. I've learned to keep my cool when others push me around. My sisters encourage me to do what's best.

13. Being in a sorority taught me to stand up for others.
Even more important than standing up for yourself is standing up for others who don't have the power or strength to stand up for themselves. I've learned to use my skills for good. When my sister is being treated unfairly, you can bet I have her back.

14. Being in a sorority taught me how to work on a team.
My sorority has hundreds of different personalities. One of the reasons I chose to accept the bid from my sorority over others is because it didn't have a cookie-cutter personality or image. I enjoyed the diversity. Working with people who are different than you can prove to be difficult though. I learned to work with people from all different backgrounds and hometowns and cultures for a common goal.

15. Being in a sorority taught me how to have fun.
I'm a very serious person. I take my studies and my work very seriously, and sometimes I forget to enjoy life. My sisters taught me to enjoy the moment and to have fun in all things.

16. Being in a sorority taught me how to be a friend.
Above everything else, being in a sorority taught me how to be a good friend. I learned this by watching other women pour their love on me. My sisters have gone out of their way to help me understand economics homework, take me to dinner, do my hair, watch Netflix with me, drive me across town, call me out when I do wrong, thank me when I do right, listen to my rants, laugh with me, congratulate me, cry with me, hold my hand, hug my neck and show me that they love me. I, in return, show my love for my sisters similarly. Love is selfless. Love is putting others before yourself. Love is the foundation of friendship and the foundation of sisterhood. My sisters taught me to love greatly, love fully and love deeply. My sorority has blessed me with friendships that will last a lifetime, and I am so thankful.

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Thanking about whatever is just,
Danielle

If you can't fly from bullies, you can still sing.

Some people can be rude, disrespectful and cruel. I call these people what they are: bullies. Bullies want power over your thoughts, self-esteem and confidence. They want you to be silent, and they want you to believe you are less than what you really are.

Bullies can't win if you speak up. Bullies can't win if you have hope.

“Hope” is the thing with feathers -

That perches in the soul -

And sings the tune without the words -

And never stops - at all -

And sweetest - in the Gale - is heard -

And sore must be the storm -

That could abash the little Bird

That kept so many warm -

I’ve heard it in the chillest land -

And on the strangest Sea -

Yet - never - in Extremity,

It asked a crumb - of me.

-Emily Dickinson

I've always had a fascination with birds. I love listening to their songs, watching their flights and observing their movements. How nice it must be to have wings and to fly away from the situation you're dealing with. To my delight, the white pelicans arrived in south Louisiana this week. The massive birds soar in with flocks of thousands of their kin. White pelicans migrate south for warmer winters and more food options. Birds migrate for more ideal conditions. Instead of adapting to their situation, birds fly to more opportune locations.

Why don't humans do what birds do? Why do we surround ourselves by bullies who drag us down, who chip away at our self-worth? Why do we let others determine what we think about ourselves? Why don't we fly away from bullies?



Maybe sometimes we can't fly away from the bullies because they come in form of bosses who control our paycheck, or professors who control our grades, or powerful community members who can control our reputation. For people who battle anxiety, bullies can be especially difficult to deal with. It can be excruciating for anxious people to stand up and to speak out to bullies. However, this is the only way we can maintain our hope, because even though some birds don't migrate, and even though they stay put in the cold, they still make music for all the world to hear.

If you can't fly, you can still sing.

Sing about your blessings. Sing about your sorrows. Sing about your hope. Never stop singing.


Thinking about whatever is just,
Danielle

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Taking The Field By Storm

College: a place where study, friendship, growth and fun collide into a beautiful, magical and chaotic firework show. It's a place where you learn the skills that will project you into your career path. You bond over books and beer with the classmates who call you "sister" and "friend." College is a place where you grow up into the person you're meant to be.

Every day on college campuses across the nation, you'll find students pouring over books and feverishly typing on laptops. These students go to the bars as regularly as they go to the library, take naps in the quad, and laugh over Netflix with their roommates in their dorms and Greek houses. Each day, these students create countless memories that blur together into a nostalgic experience that can't normally be pinpointed by an exact moment in time.

But every once in a while, a night so magical, so experiential, so fun happens and creates just the distinct moment every college student desires to have tucked away in their memory.

For LSU students, that night happened Saturday Oct. 25, when the mighty Tigers squashed their longtime foe, the Ole Miss Rebels, in a hard-fought, vicious and violent battle in Death Valley.

The night was destined to be magical. After the Mississippi State Bulldogs beat the Tigers in Baton Rouge, LSU was humiliated in Auburn the very next week. Signals of hope emitted when LSU clenched victory from the Florida Gators in the Swamp, and when LSU crushed a less-than-stellar Kentucky. But what the Tigers really needed was an exciting win at home against a strong opponent. And what a better time to get that W than on Homecoming night?

Thousands of alumni arrived in Baton Rouge last week to visit their alma mater, and to hopefully relive the memories of past-matchups against Ole Miss on Saturday.

Magic happened in Death Valley that night.

Personally, I've never heard the stadium so loud, the aura so electric, the students so alive. In that night, we shared pride and love for our university, our dear LSU. We wore our stripes and cheered our Tigers to victory and celebrated communally on the eye of the Tiger that night. Chanting "LSU" over and over again, slapping our armor-clad, jersey-wearing classmates on the back, kissing the loves of our lives, hugging the necks of friends and sisters and brothers and strangers, we loved LSU so fiercely on an exclusive level reserved only for current students. How wonderful it is to gain an education from the place that blessed us with memorable nights like this with friends.

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How I'm Using Twitter to Decide Who to Vote For Congress

I am so thankful to live in a country where I can vote for my representatives. I'm also thankful I live in an age when communicating with candidates has never been easier.

I live in Louisiana's 6th Congressional District. The seat was filled by Bill Cassidy (R), who is now running against incumbent Mary Landrieu (D) for one of Louisiana's Senate seats. The Democrats have put forth one real liberal contender, who also happens to be a state felon. Edwin Edwards, who served as Louisiana's governor, is prevented by law to from holding a state office. However, he can still run for federal office. Numerous Republicans have thrown their hats in the ring. They all claim they're the best for the job, but it's a lot of mumbo jumbo to me. Chances are, there will be a runoff between Edwards and one of the Republicans. Because I will not be voting for a crook, I wanted to know how all the candidates feel about the issues that I care about.

So, I did a little experiment. I tweeted out to all the candidates who had a Twitter account, and asked them a simple question: "Why should I vote for you? I care about the environment, education and low taxes." I even tweeted out to Edwards just to see if and how he would respond.

Four days later, Republicans Dan Claitor, Craig McCulloch and Lenar Whitney and Democrat Richard Lieberman still have not responded.

Republican Paul Dietzel was the first to respond. He sent out out eight tweets in response to me. Dietzel directed me to the homepage, about page and "other policy" page of his website. He said I should vote for him because he has private sector experience, education and a "new perspective." Should he be elected, he said he would be accessible and transparent. Based on his quick response on social media, I believe that statement to be true. From the links and tweets he sent me, Dietzel believes Louisiana's coastline should be restored by a public-private partnership; higher education should "adapt to prepare students for jobs of the future;" and taxes should not be raised. Finally, he tugged at our connection of education background. He is an LSU Manship School of Mass Communication alumnus; I am going to graduate from the school in December. I was most impressed by his obvious desire of my vote. When I asked follow-up questions, he quickly responded. Dietzel is a millenial who wants to connect to other millenials.

@daniellenkelley I will post a summary on each vote I make so our people know my thought process on pieces legislation.
— Paul Dietzel II (@PaulDietzel) October 21, 2014

@daniellenkelley we need a new perspective that wont be found in career staffers, politicians or bureaucrats. Policy: http://t.co/q4iL0S5eOA
— Paul Dietzel II (@PaulDietzel) October 20, 2014

Republican Garret Graves was next to respond. He sent a link to a YouTube video of him speaking at TEDxLSU about Louisiana's coastal problem. Graves formerly served as Louisiana's Chairman of the Coastal Protection and Restoration Authority, so he is an expert of Louisiana's environment issues. Graves didn't tweet to me about his views on education or low taxes, but he did offer me to direct message him if I had any more questions. The next day, my sorority president (who is interning at Graves' office) told me Graves asked her about me because he looked at my Twitter bio and saw that we're sorority sisters. I was impressed because he took the time to read my bio and make the connection to an intern. This also proved that Graves tweeted himself, and an intern did not send out those tweets. I did not direct message Graves, but I did watch the TEDxLSU talk.  I was most impressed by his passion for Louisiana that emulated when he spoke about Louisiana's land loss. If elected, I know he would fight for help in Washington for our coast's erosion.

@daniellenkelley anytime. Please stop by our office or send a private message with contact info so we can answer any other questions.
— Garret Graves (@garretgraves) October 22, 2014

Edwin Edwards responded third by tweeting back to me, "there are 3 great reasons why you should vote for me." I asked him to elaborate, but he didn't reply back. Even though I wasn't going to vote for Edwards in the first place, I was surprised he didn't even try to win my vote.

@daniellenkelley there are 3 great reasons why you should vote for me.
— Edwin Edwards (@EdwinWEdwards) October 21, 2014

After this research, I've narrowed down my vote to Paul Dietzel and Garret Graves. I'm going to continue looking over both candidates' websites, reading newspaper articles and tweeting to the candidates. Whatever your political affiliation or age or sex or income level or education level, I encourage you to do to two things. First, VOTE! It's your right to vote, so don't waste that right. Second, RESEARCH! You can skim headlines, look through candidates' websites or even tweet to them like I did. Become an educated voter. These men and women are going to be representing YOU and what YOU believe. It's best to cast a ballot for someone you align with. Voting is a one of the most just things in the American government system, and I'm so thankful for it.

Thinking about whatever is just,
Danielle

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8 Songs For Your Anti-Anxiety Anthem Playlist

I'm constantly looking for ways to make my fight against anxiety easier. One way I do this is listening to uplifting music with encouraging lyrics. Below are some of my favorite songs to listen to when I feel stressed or worried. They also make great workout music! Have songs that you would include in the playlist? Leave them in the comments below!

1. "Brave" by Sara Bareilles
Standout lyrics: "Maybe there’s a way out of the cage where you live / Maybe one of these days you can let the light in / Show me how big your brave is"

Why I like it: It can be tough keeping feelings locked inside. It helps when you talk, and whenever I'm racking up the courage to speak, I listen to this song.




2. "Secrets" by Mary Lambert
Standout lyrics: "They tell us from the time we're young / To hide the things that we don't like about ourselves / Inside ourselves / I know I'm not the only one / who spent so long attempting to be someone else / Well I'm over it"

Why I like it: While I do believe we have to power to improve ourselves, there are some things about ourselves that we can't control, like anxiety. So why should I care who knows that I fight anxiety? If anything, my community can help me through this journey. Also, the song is super catchy.



3. "Greater" by MercyMe
Standout lyrics: "Every day I wrestle with the voices / That keep telling me I’m not right / But that’s alright / ‘Cause I hear a voice and He calls me redeemed / When others say I’ll never be enough / And greater is the One living inside of me / Than he who is living in the world"

Why I like it: God sees past my anxiety, and God is greater than "the voice that keep telling me I'm not right." This song gives me such hope!



4. "Shake it Off" by Taylor Swift
Standout lyrics: "But I keep cruising / Can't stop, won't stop grooving / It's like I got this music / In my mind saying, 'It's gonna be alright'"

Why I like it: Ok, maybe these lyrics aren't "standout" per se, but this song puts me in THE BEST MOOD. And when the dark thoughts come, songs like this push them in a corner.



5. "I Lived" OneRepublic
Standout lyrics: "I, I did it all / I owned every second / That this world could give / I saw so many places / The things that I did / Yeah, with every broken bone / I swear I lived"

Why I like it: This song encourages us to live life to the fullest. Check out their video about a teenager battling cystic fibrosis set to this song.



6. "My Lighthouse" by Rend Collective
Standout lyrics: "I won't fear what tomorrow brings / With each morning I'll rise and sing / My God's love will lead me through / You are the peace in my troubled sea"

Why I like it: This song reminds me that God doesn't promise a life without fear or bad times, but He does promise us that He'll never leave. As long as we remember to look toward Him, we'll be taken care of.



7. "Every Good Thing" by The Afters
Standout lyrics: "There will be days that give me more than I can take / But I know that You always make beauty from my heartache / Don't wanna forget or take for granted / That it's a beautiful life we live / I'm not gonna miss the moments like this / This is a beautiful life You give"

Why I like it: While it's difficult for me to control the negative thoughts in my mind, it's easy for me to appreciate the things God has blessed me with. This song reminds me of "every good thing" in my life: my family, friends, education, home... the list goes on!



8. "Anything Could Happen" by Ellie Goulding
Standout lyrics: "Letting darkness grow / As if we need its palette and we need its color / But now I've seen it through / And now I know the truth / That anything could happen"

Why I like it: With the pulsing beat and uplifting melody, this song puts a smile on my face and reminds me that "anything could happen." Why worry?



I'm always looking for new music, so feel free to leave your favorite anthems in the comments below! Until next time, I'll be praying that we can fight mental illness together.

Thinking about whatever is just,
Danielle


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The secret is out: I go to therapy.

I've had something of a secret for a while, and today - World Mental Health Day - I want to let you know that I battle anxiety. I have been visiting a therapist for seven months now, and I can honestly say I am a more relaxed, more content and more joyful person than I was when I tried to fight anxiety and stress on my own.

It has been a difficult journey, though. I've had to relive traumas in my memories I would rather not talk about. I've explored the foundations of emotions - the deep, dark, gritty stuff no one wants to talk about. My therapist asked me questions with answers I'd rather not talk about.

But here's the thing. I talked. And it was hard. And it felt bad in the moment. But it was worth it.

And that's why I'm letting the secret out. This society has got to stop stigmatizing mental health issues! We've got to talk about anxiety like mine, and we've got to talk about even scarier mental illnesses like severe depression, bipolar disorder, eating disorders and more!

So I'm doing my part, and I'm talking about it.

I've vented, and I've cried. I've experienced anger, abandonment, disappointment, sadness and fear.

But I can tell you that experiencing these emotions with a licensed therapist is a lot more preferable than experiencing them alone. So I ask you, are you stressed? Do you have problems falling asleep because your mind is racing? Is it difficult to push aside negative thoughts? Is it maybe even impossible to control the negative thoughts? Do you feel like you're fighting a battle inside your own mind? If you answered yes to any of these questions, I urge you to seek help. This war is not yours to fight alone. Seek counsel from a loved one, a friend or a religious leader. These people want to help you. I also ask you to seriously consider seeking professional help from a therapist or counselor. My therapist is an amazing woman who has helped me explore my mind and control my mind. You don't have to do this alone.

If you need immediate help, please call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 1-800-273-TALK.

I pray for peace in all our minds.



Whatever is just,
Danielle