I came across the #ShoutYourAbortion hashtag by way of Buzzfeed and a Facebook friend, and after reading the tweets, my heart broke into a million pieces. The majority of the women using #ShoutYourAbortion are sharing their abortion experiences and why they have no shame, regret or sadness about the procedure.
I've had 2 abortions. I don't have to justify or explain them to anybody. My life is more valuable than a potential life. #shoutyourabortion
— Clementine Ford (@clementine_ford) September 21, 2015
Had an abortion procedure done at age 22 because I was WAY too young to parent. Have never, ever regretted it. #ShoutYourAbortion
— Mary Emily O'Hara (@MaryEmilyOHara) September 20, 2015
A fully developed human woman is more important than a fetus. #shoutyourabortion #istandwithpp
— Bonita Applebum (@Crass_Sass) September 21, 2015
My initial reaction was anger, fury and disgust. I wanted to shout and throw things. I wanted to say terribly, mean things about these women. "Selfish! Baby killers! Disgusting!" I thought.But then I realized that those thoughts are the exact reason these women are using #ShoutYourAbortion.
Many women who have abortions are simply young, poor, scared and pregnant. Many times they don't have the financial or emotional support from a partner or family. They have dreams, they want to get an education, and they want to work full-time. They see a baby as the end of those aspirations.
My mother found herself in a similar situation when she was 17 and pregnant. She was going to be the first person in her family to go to college. She graduated valedictorian of her small, rural high school, and great things were expected of her. So when my mother found out she was pregnant with me, she was in shock. She didn't talk about the pregnancy to anyone, and went about her life as usual for months. She moved into her freshman dorm room, enrolled in classes and began college. She wanted to make her family proud. She pretended she wasn't pregnant because she had shame and regret and sadness, and most of all, fear. Who wants to drop out of college, work a job below their capabilities, and raise a child before you want to be a mother?
For a fleeting moment, she thought about abortion. Immediately, she pushed the thought away because she recognized that no life is more important than another. With support from her family, she got through the pregnancy and raised me.
Twenty-two years later, she not only completed her dream of being the first person in her family to get a college degree, but she also earned a master's degree. I'm currently working on my second degree as well. My mom is my role model, and we have a fantastic relationship.
Pro-choicers argue that women deserve to be in control of their lives and not at the mercy of a newborn. But no life is more important than another. We should protect pregnant women just as much as their unborn babies. We should promote adoption, and show these women that if they are not ready to become mothers, that is ok! They can give the most precious gift of all to people who desperately want to be parents. We should financially and emotionally support pregnant women who decide to keep their babies as their own. Pregnancy is expensive, and we should help our sisters in need. We should provide counseling. We should provide friendship. We should provide, above all, love to any pregnant woman.
The root of the problem with #ShoutYourAbortion is that these women felt the need to have an abortion in the first place. If we supported women before, during AND after their pregnancies, then maybe, just maybe, they would never have had an abortion, and never would have wanted to shout about it.
Let us pray for wisdom, peace, strength and clarity for pregnant women who weren't initially planning on becoming mothers. Let us pray for generosity and kindness for the pro-life movement. Let us pray for couples seeking to adopt and that their family may grow. Let us pray for the unborn and that they may live.
Thinking about whatever is just,
Danielle
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